Me- What shifts do your parents work?

Child- They work nights, days and evenings.

Me- How does your parents work schedule affect you?

Child-

-I am a little bored when one person is working and the other one is taking a nap.  What am I supposed to do?  It is pretty boring.  If I want to eat something I don’t know how to make most things. 

-When someone is sleeping during the day and I am at home I usually watch TV, read books, play teacher and spend time in the basement playing.

-I have to be very quiet when mom or dad is sleeping because or they will wake up and be kind or grumpy and tired.

-Sometimes I go and stay with Nanny and Papa or a friend because mom and dad are at work at the same time.  I like that.  I have a lot of fun most of the time.

-Sometimes one parent misses something like a Christmas concert.  I understand that though because mom and dad work to make sure we have food on the table, a roof over our heads, heating in the house and clothes on us. (This child is obviously communicated with. J )

-My mom and dad can be grumpy sometimes when they are tired but it isn’t that often and I know that it is because they are tired.

-They are pretty organized and mom has a calendar that has mom and dad’s work schedules on it.  They are in different colors so that they know who works when.  It is pretty interesting. 

Me- Do you mind being organized?

Child- I don’t mind.  We get to do lots together because of being organized.  I don’t mind planning stuff if it means I get to go to the farm… or the mountains  … and other fun stuff like that with mom and dad.

Me- Do you think you will work shift work when you grow up?

Child- Well…. ummmm… I’ll probably have to.

Me- Why do you say that?

Child- Well mom works shift work, dad does and I think nanny does too so I think it is pretty normal.

Me- What do you want to be when you grow up?

Child- A kindergarten teacher.

I told her that teachers don’t always work shift work… but when they do planning or marking in the evening that is called an extended day, and that is considered shift work.  It is VERY common.

She thought that was reasonable.  J 

In my opinion, with some communication and planning it can be very healthy for a child to have shift workers as parents.  I think kids are very adaptable when communicated with.  This fantastic little girl obviously had been involved with the planning of things and talked to quite a bit.  Shift work makes healthy relationships with your children more difficult, but with some additional effort I think it is doable… and WELL worth the effort!

Over and Out.

April

- Seeking to understand others and then to be understood. This is a very effective way to build relationships by building bridges of understanding.

-Listening to create positive relationships and respect.

-Dealing with Conflict in the workplace in a way that encourages a healthy work environment.

With this group a number of people came up to me to talk to me about the part about listening.  All these topics are extremely important, but this team really seemed to feel the part about ‘listening’.  This could also have been because I really felt that topic that day. 

In my opinion listening is one of the greatest gifts you can give another person.  Not just hearing… but listening.  Life seems to be very fast moving, especially at work these days.  People are getting caught up in the fast pace of it all and not listening to each other.  Taking a moment to hear about how someone’s day is going is an amazing way to build relationships!   Really hearing what they say, and focusing on them while they talk instead of letting the crazy world distract you, is a great way to understand people and show them respect.

It is funny because many people think that the people at a retreat listening to a seminar are the ones that are learning, but I feel like I learn as much from each group as they learn from me.  I saw many people put a very thoughtful, self reflective, look on their face that showed that they were realizing that they are guilty of some of the classic mistakes people make when listening….or I guess… not listening.  The top three comments that I received the biggest reactions from were:

-Interrupting people when they are talking due to distractions

-Deciding what you think another person is going to say and then hearing that… instead of what they actually say

-Thinking about what you are going to say while the other person is talking… instead of listening to them

Do you do any of these things?  Even the smallest changes in your listening skills can make a HUGE difference in your work relationships, your career, your life and in the person that you are. 

After doing that presentation I have decided that I am going to use my listening skills with everyone that I work with or know in my personal life … instead of excluding some people that don’t necessarily listen to me very well.  I have the ability to listen so I am going to be the bigger person and give them that gift even though they may not give it back.  As Gandhi said “We must be the change we wish to see in the world”.  J  That is my step forward from that presentation.

What change are you going to make in your listening to improve you work and/or home relationships?

Over and Out

April

1. What creates the largest amount of stress for you at work?
2. How do you deal with that stress?

Three great responses:

“My four biggest stressors at work are:

-I find tension between co-workers.  It affects everyone in the office and makes it uncomfortable being there. 

-Any time the word Budget gets mentioned

-Working too many hours

-Managing a team that is not always reliable”

“The biggest stressor at work is our current boss and his lack of respect for his people; from his Leaders on down to the people that work for us. He is one of the most militant folks that I have ever met and that is echoed by many of the other people that work here.
How do I cope… well sometimes fine but on other days not so well.  I have had a really bad year where I have had at least one, if not more, major negative impacts each month.  I try to cope by volunteering with Search and Rescue and other community organizations that add meaning to my life.”

“I’d have to say that the majority of my stress at work is time management / trying to meet deadlines. A lot of times I’ll have jobs piled up and they are scheduled to be completed for a certain date, but then other jobs come up that interfere, or things take longer than anticipated (due to customer delays or changes, not enough information, etc…).
Often times my solution has been to just put in more hours and try and get things wrapped up, but it’s not always a great solution if you are busy as there will always be work piling up. It starts to create a circle of working more and more, and trying harder to get things done, but it ends up being somewhat futile. Not exactly a healthy strategy in the end either.
If you have others that end up in the same boat, I’d definitely be interested in hearing about what they are doing to handle it.”

It seems to me like most people have a much easier time identifying stressors… but are struggling in finding solutions.   I guess that if people have found solutions that work completely for them they would not be telling me these things stress them out.  Stress at work can be very tough to deal with.  It can affect all aspects of your life and steal your balance and wellbeing.  This makes finding solutions worth the time and energy it requires. 

As identified by these responses, as well as others, the major areas of challenge in terms of work stress include:

-Conflicts with co-workers

-Lack of/or negative leadership

-Hard decision making situations

-Time management

-Leading a team that you don’t always have complete comfort with

-Having stress in your personal life that you can’t seem to stop from affecting you in your work

- Financial

-Job security

-Not feeling appreciated and/or respected

The list goes on…

I believe the first step in dealing with work stress, and any stress for that matter, is to become aware of what is stressing you out.  What is REALLY stressing you out?  You might think it is that lady you work with that always steals your stapler and interrupts when you work …. But it likely goes deeper than that.  Maybe you are letting things bother you because you don’t feel appreciated.  Please think about that.  It is very hard to solve a problem before you know what it is. 

I would like to pass this over to you for ideas…

What suggestions do you have in how to deal with work stress?  Why does it work? 

Stay tuned for more on this topic.

Over and Out

April

I met a good friend of mine for a glass of wine last Saturday.  She was telling me about how she had just left work and was hoping she could avoid going in the next day.  That captured my attention as she seems to be at work late most days, and then in on the weekend.  She then proceeded to tell me about how she was really worried about all the work she had piling up, and it was causing her a lot of stress.  She described a dream she had experienced the night before.   She had been at work and a co worker had asked to talk to her.  She walked into that persons office and her co-worker started yelling at her… and she responded by stomping away in a pretty bad mood.  Her boss and the in-house lawyer then walked into her office to tell her that she needed to apologize to the rude coworker that had just yelled at her!!  She woke up… and had to get ready and go to work.  What a great example of work life taking over personal time.  My poor friend has so much on her ‘work plate’ that it has started to affect her stress levels outside of work and her sleep.  She is VERY good at her job and really identifies with it…. and thus takes the results that she has at work to heart.  It seems to have invaded her personal time as well though.  Not just through time at work… but time stressing about work.  Do you identify with this story?  If so, it may be positive for you to take a moment to think about whether or not you are happy with the time you have for yourself.  You deserve it.  You may be very good at your job, but you are good at your LIFE too… and deserve to feel balance.  The first step to making changes in this area is realizing what you are currently doing. 

Do you feel a sense of balance between your work and your life?  If not, I encourage you to ask yourself the following questions….

1.  What are the biggest priorities in your life?

2.  Are you happy with how much time you spend on your priorities?

3.   Why is it important to you that you focus on your priorities?

4.  What are your challenges with achieving work/ life balance?

5.  Why is achieving work/life balance important to you?

5.  What small change can you make this week that will help you start achieving the balance you desire?

This exercise is just a small activity you can do to start thinking about achieving the balance you deserve.  I teach a lot of seminars on work/life balance and have learned A LOT about it in the process.  My participants are the best teachers!!  This is just a jumping off point… but you have to start somewhere….

Wishing you balance and wellness this holiday season!

April Smith

Please make taking care of yourself as a shift worker a priority!!  You deserve to feel well and live a full, healthy life!  It is not impossible to feel good when working shift work!  It just takes some extra effort and planning.  You are worth that effort!

1.    As a shift worker what issues/concerns are you facing as an individual in your home life and as a member of your community?

-Lack of sleep

-Difficulty balancing work and home life

-Not eating a healthy diet

-Noise problems while trying to sleep during the day

-Kids making noise while trying to sleep

-Missing spending time with kids

-Daylight interfering with day time sleeping

-Time management problems

-Less involvement in the community

-Not able to help children with school work

-Can’t watch the play offs (hockey)

-Miss family involvement, time with extended family even harder to schedule

-Lack of consistent schedule with overtime etc…

-Lack of attending some social activities in the community

-Hard to participate in school classes or activity classes

-Missing church

-No time to communicate

-Finding time for shopping and errands can be hard

-Lack of time for sex

-Not on the same schedule as friends and family

-TIRED and this impacts many things

-Hard to maintain community spirit

2.    What advice would you give to another person working shift work?

-Quality of rest is just as important as how long you are sleeping (make sure you are rested)

-Use ‘white noise’ like a fan to help you sleep.  That way you only have to get used to one noise!

-Eat a healthy diet

-Low sugar and caffeine. Don’t have any caffeine or too much sugar close to when you go to bed.

-Be organized before working your shifts (planning meals etc…)

-Set a routine that works for you

-Make sure your sleeping room is really dark

-Try using earplugs for sleeping

-Don’t sleep too much on the first day off after working nights. This helps with getting back to your regular sleep habits.  This way you can still go to sleep that night.

-Find out what works for you and communicate it to your friends and family

-Plan time with friends and family in advance so that you will be able to spend quality time with them.

-Make friends on your shift so that it is easier to find time to spend with friends.

-Don’t eat big, unhealthy meals at night.  Your system doesn’t digest food as quickly at night!

3.    What resources and support are available for shift workers?

-Family

-Friends

-Counseling

-Co-workers (they know what you are going through and might have some good ideas)

-The Shifting to Wellness Course

-The Internet (Google it J )

-Doctor

-Programs at your workplace (for you and for your family)

Stay Well!!

Over and Out.

April

I am writing this because I have really taken this advice to heart lately and feel amazing, and full of energy because of it.  I run my own business and it can be physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually draining at times.  I felt like I was not giving myself and my passion to the company after Christmas this year.  I then had a number of different people/ situations enter into my life and it has rejuvenated me in both my personal and professional life.  It truly shows in the results I am now getting. 

The first source of my inspiration was the people in my class for a Shifting to Wellness Train the Trainer.  Shifting to Wellness is a class for helping shift workers deal positively with the challenges that shift work can present.  It helps shift workers lead happy, healthy and productive lives.  I have been involved with the program for many years and it is one of the services my company provides.  The people that I was mentoring in the process of becoming great Shifting to Wellness Instructors were amazing people to have in my class.  Each of them taught me something different about how to be a better instructor/motivator/person.  One lady told us a story about how she was once fired from her job, and then moved forward in a positive way to find a job twice as good, and far better suited for her.  She reminded me that the things that don’t work out leave room in your life for better things.  That helped me embrace my challenges as valuable lessons instead of failures.  Everyone was truly incredible in that class and helped wake me up inside!

Another source of huge inspiration for me is my fabulous business mentor.  I met with him this week and had a very open and honest conversation about life and business.  He is such a kind, charismatic and knowledgeable person.  I walked away from that tea at a local coffee shop ready to jump start my own enthusiasm and move forward with purpose and courage.  I really recommend finding a mentor for business/life.  Surrounding yourself with good people that are willing to be on your team is very valuable.  Create a web of support; you will have more to give to the things you are pursuing personally and professionally.  I cannot thank my mentor enough.  He makes me believe I can make it through anything.  I think the best piece of advice he gave me this time was to be as good to myself as I would be to a friend in need.  Show myself compassion and kindness just as I would someone else.  We are our own worst enemies sometimes and can be too hard on ourselves.  I love that advice and hope to really embrace it.

Another person that has really opened my eyes to creating possibility and positivity lately is a new friend/work associate of mine from the city of Fort McMurray.  He has had an incredibly positive impact on that community and I have seen him accomplish things in the last month that have made me stop and think about how anything is possible if you just have faith and a little bit of patience. 

By surrounding myself by such positive people I feel rejuvenated and ready to motivate others around me.  J

I hope that you will take this story about my inspiration, and how it has created a ripple effect in my life and my own ability to lead and motivate others, and use it as a lesson in your own life.  Start with your own growth and you will have so much more to give others.  Be good to yourself and invest in your own wellbeing.  Surround yourself with good people and you will feel refreshed and ready to go!! 

Over and Out

April Smith

These are my top 10 recommendations for reducing stress as the planner of an event:

1.      Give yourself time!!!  It can be surprising how far in advance certain things like permits, securing a location and booking equipment need to be done.

2.      Start with making a list of things to do.  That will help you wrap your head around what you need to make happen and what order things should be done.  This broad picture plan will help you move forward in a realistic way.

3.      Secure, permits, location, budget and timelines before you dive into details.  If you are told that you are not approved for a permit, after you have already started the marketing, that could be very stressful and also unprofessional.

4.      Build yourself out of tasks on the day of.  Your time is best used handling the unexpected or answering questions.  If you give yourself specific things to do on the day you may find yourself in a stressful situation handling emergencies, and not able to handle the tasks you assigned yourself.  There are so many elements to an event, that you need to be able to mobilize and handle unanticipated occurrences on the day.

5.      Put plans in writing so that if you are called away on an emergency on the day of the event everyone will know what they are meant to be doing.

6.      Build a team if the event is large.  Build the team based on people’s strengths and surround yourself with people that are smarter than you are.  You are only as strong as the team around you. 

7.      Be aware of other events going on the same day as yours.  This will cut down on any surprises based on attendance.

8.      On the day of an event have a list of important phone numbers with you at all times, have a snack and water with you so that you don’t get so caught up in everything that you forget to take care of yourself and have a copy of all important event related documents with you.  You will be surprised how often you will need these things!!!!

9.      Don’t expect things to go exactly as you have planned them!  Expect an adventure, and welcome the challenge.  Your attitude towards this will have a huge impact on the success of the event.

10.  Have fun.  When you plan an event and have fun with it, it will shine through in the level of impact your event will have. J

Happy Planning!!

April Smith

I recently taught three seminars on this topic to shift workers here in Edmonton.  As part of the day I had them write out their biggest challenge in relation to relationships and community involvement.  These are the responses that I received:

-Stand-by wrecks home time

-Managing time is very difficult

-I don’t seem to have time to keep in touch with out of town family and friends… too tired

-Stand- by ruined my life

-Coordination of time for leisure activities!

-I never spend enough time with my friends

-I don’t have time to see friends

-I am anti-social

-I don’t spend enough time relaxing with family and friends

-No time to play sports

-No time for snow cleaning

-Fatigue, time management and grumpiness

-I need to spend more time and give more attention to my spouse

-I never feel like doing anything after work

-Time with extended family

-No time for family and friends

-Try to see friends and family

-No sane time to do activities, no time to be able to share with others and when we do I am too tired or busy

-Feel too tired to do anything

-Spend more quality time with son

-Never have enough time to do things around the house… repairs etc…. also better time management needed

- Less work, more time with family… overtime is issue

-Challenge to do more things at home involving my favorite pastimes

-My co-worker wants my job… this causes stress/pressure, backstabbing, criticism and emotional abuse

-Finding enough time to spend with my family and parents

-Worrying about kids

-Socializing with friends who work later hours than myself

-Trouble scheduling events with family and friends

-Not spending enough time with kids

-Normal family life is a challenge

-Not enough time for sports activities

-Spending time with family

-Working with someone I can’t get along with

-Hours of work

-Getting a doctor’s appointment for meds

-Hard time spending enough time with girlfriend

-Spending more time with my wife

-No interest in socializing and activities

-Spending time with family

-Not enough time in the day for cleaning and family

-Sleep

-Finding time to do things that need to get done

-Being out of sync with everyone you know

These are very REAL responses from people due to the fact that they were completely anonymous.  I can not reveal which workplace these came from… but I wanted to share the learning that came out of it. 

Working shift work (anything outside of Monday to Friday, 9am-5pm type hours) has a very significant impact on how connected people feel with the people around them.  Working long hours can lead to feelings of isolation, fatigue, moodiness, depression and loneliness among other things.  These types of feeling have a huge effect on people’s lives… and I am so glad that employers are starting to invest in the wellbeing of their employee’s in these ways. 

I have been teaching corporate wellness classes and seminars for over 6 years, and I always have many people ask me questions about this.  Some of the key things I have learned on this topic have been:

-      Divorce and relationship break ups are MUCH higher with shift workers and people who work long hours.

-      Shift work, and working a lot, not only impacts the worker, but also families, children and friends.  It is important to involve everyone impacted in efforts to create balance.

-      Working shift work in northern areas (some examples in Alberta are Edmonton, Fort McMurray, Grand Prairie and Lloydminster etc.) can be especially tough due to very short days in the winter and very long days in the summer.  In the winter people will often not see the sunlight at all in a 24 hour period due to work schedules, and in the summer people may have a very difficult time getting to sleep when they need to because of all the sunlight.

-      It can be quite challenging to effectively organize your time at home as a person that is working long hours.  Bills still need to be paid, kids still need to make it to hockey or dance class, groceries still much be purchased and an effort still needs to be made to spend quality time with the important people in your life.  It can be tough.

-      Shift work often impacts fatigue levels, and cause a person to be away from home quite a bit, and this can affect sexual health in a negative way.  This is an important element to relationships and is worth being aware of.

-      STRESS is often harder to manage as a person working shift work, or working a lot!!! Stress can impact a person’s health a great deal and really have an effect on relationships.

-      Couples, or friends, working different shifts can have a very hard time trying to coordinate time together.  This can make maintaining their relationship a challenge.

Those are just some of the hit home messages that I have learned along the way.  Don’t despair!  There are so many things that you can do to help maintain relationships and feel less isolated from your community with a busy work schedule!!!!  The first step is realizing it is an issue for you… and starting to think about it and make it a priority! 

I can’t dive into all of the tips I have, as I won’t have anything to teach in my seminars if I do.  I do have a story I would like to share though.  It is an important story to me, so I hope you get something out of it.  It outlines the importance of the small things that you can do to make relationships around you a priority.  In true ‘April’ style I am going to use my family again as an example.  I really have learned some of my biggest life lessons from them. 

This story is about my dad.  My dad worked shift work for quite a while when I was growing up.  It wasn’t always nights, but definitely always extended hours.  Sometimes when life got crazy and I was running around with school, sports, friends and jobs when I was a bit older… I would often not see my dad a lot. 

One summer I had to get up really early for a summer job, and dad and I would get up at the same time.  We would always count down how many more early mornings we had that week by saying “3 more get ups…. 2 more get ups” etc….  After that summer, I started writing dad little notes and putting them beside his lunch box in the evening, after he was in bed, whenever I was at home.  I am kind of a goof so some of them where pretty silly, but most of them said something simple like “Have a wonderful day at work dad!!!” 

I was at home a few years ago visiting my parents and my dad called me into the kitchen.  He wanted to show me something.  He told me that over the years he had saved every single note I had ever written to him!  He opened up his lunch box and smiled.  He had so many of those notes jammed into his lunch box that he couldn’t fit his lunch in there anymore!  I bet there were hundreds of them.  He had to take some of the notes out, and put them in a box in his closet, so that he could take his lunch to work.  J  That was a really nice moment between my dad and I, and I can still get me a bit choked up just thinking about it.  It didn’t take any time at all to write those little notes, but it sure brightened his day at work.  All those little efforts ended up adding up to help strengthen the really special relationship we had, and still have to this day. 

Your efforts in maintaining relationships don’t have to be huge, just thoughtful.  What small things can you do today to maintain an important relationship to you with your busy work schedule??

Over and out. J

April Smith

My sister works shift work as a nurse here in Edmonton.  I have to say that nurses really are wonderful.  They take care of the rest of us at some time or another, but they often do not take care of themselves.  This holds true for many health care workers.  It is not surprising, as they tend to work quite intensely.  Hospitals are very busy places.  They also deal with a lot of stress.  My sister works very hard and also has a family to look after when she gets home.

I have witnessed some extremely tired moments for her over the years.  This has happened primarily when sleep became a second priority in order to get other things done.  I have also noticed that my sister has not made the time to fit physical activity into her life, or time for herself for that matter.  It is hard to see someone you care about so much look so drained at times.

This story is getting better!

Lately I have noticed… wait for it… this is shocking… she seems to have found a way to make physical activity a priority!!  Now, I have known her for… well her entire life… and she has not been the type to embrace anything that includes ‘working out’. 

In the spring I signed her up for a corporate challenge with the Vitalize Team called ‘The Race Across Africa’.  It is basically counting up all the kilometers travelled by our team of 10 people, to try and make it the entire way across Africa in a 5 month period.  We can run, walk, bike or swim.  In truth, I needed an extra person so I signed her up without asking her!  Sisters have to forgive you right?!?!?  Well, here is the great part… she has turned out to be one of the most motivated people on the team.  I called her the other day and she was out running with some friends!  I have to say that again.  She was out running with some friends!!!  I am so proud of her. 

I think she was ready to make some life changes.  She is looking good, making sleep a priority, getting out and exercising and attempting to eat well.  I think when you make time for one healthy aspect of your life, and experience a new level of feeling good, other changes tend to follow.  I have also noticed that she is happier with her work.  She is actually making plans to go running with co-workers and is just in a better mood in general.  YAY!  People that work shift work can feel great; it just takes a bit more effort and planning.  It really is worth it though.  It can be life changing!  Look at the example of my sister.  She is like the person that I knew before she started working shift work.  J 

This story makes me very happy to be promoting shift work wellness.  It really does make a difference in people’s lives! 

-April Smith-

We are excited to be able to better communicate with our clients and show the world what we are all about!!  :) 

Check back in to hear what our team has to say, and please leave comments … we would love to hear from you.

-April Smith-